V&A XI: L. Nieboer (c), W. Carmpael, G. Carpmael, D. Pitlarge, N. Constantine, J. Arnold, C. Kulasingham, T. Bird, V. Nicoli, A. Jacot
It has been an odd summer. We have lived through a drought so severe that even the Stonor Valley has often resembled something akin to The Land of Uz. This might be considered fitting, given that the late Tom Bird, father to current president Nicky Bird, spent so much time in the African desert in the Second World War (much to the consternation of Generalfeldmarschall Rommel). My own grandfather did a stint in the desert too; perhaps there is a trend emerging. I have often found myself this summer, whilst kicking up dust in the slips, repeating the immortal lines from Lawrence of Arabia:
Bentley: “Tell me, Major Lawrence, what is it that attracts you, personally, to the desert?”
Lawrence: “It’s clean. I like it because it’s clean”.
Well, it has finally rained and the dust bowl has disappeared. We were very sad to have to call off our fixture against Chelsea Arts Club last weekend, but there is always next season. That particular rivalry will only be enhanced by a season without coming to blows (of the shot-making variety, rather than the pugilistic).
Speaking of clean: The Refresher’s Cricket Club ought to be cleaner than most, given that many of them are Barristers (and as such are held to a higher standard than your average cricketer). They are a delightful bunch who play their cricket in exactly the manner that we do ourselves: beyond reproach.
With the rain has come a holographic vibrance of such extremes that it is almost impossible to figure out where the ‘pitch’ finishes and the outfield starts, such is its ‘greenness’. Nevertheless, Captain Nieboer decided that The V&A ought to have a bat. He is nothing if not traditional.
We have struggled to build strong platforms at times this season, but W. Carpmael et. Fils (G. Carpmael) strode to the wicket with purpose. George is a strapping lad who times the ball very well indeed. Will is less elegant, but comes to the fore aesthetically due mostly to his attire. His cap? Vibrant. His jumper? Different, but vibrant. In fact, I was reminded of the late MCC Stalwart John ‘Fingers’ Fingleton, who I once saw wearing not one but two blazers at the same time.
Father and son batted well, chalking up a swift fifty partnership (their first together, no less), before Carpmael Sr. (34) was bowled. D. Pitlarge (0) danced down the track, and straight past a slow one from Richard, and suddenly we were into the middle order. Carpmael Jr. (16) was also dismissed by Richard and things looked a little tense at 56-3. Constantine (37) and Arnold (5) came together, looking to force the issue. They shared a stand of 25, before Constantine middled one to deep cover and Arnold (attempting to get the man in form back on strike, no doubt) attempted a rather optimistic two. Alas, Constantine, content with one, was leaning on his bat at the non-strikers end.
81-4.
With the lunch interval fast approaching, Nieboer (4) played within himself, taking the measure of the pitch after some time away in Barbados. On the stroke of lunch he swept a ball sweetly, straight to the man at square leg. We took lunch, reeling a little, at 88-5.
Some tyrannical wasps have made a nest of our favoured tree, so we made the most of the September sun and attacked Steph Bird’s Spaghetti alla Puttanesca with gusto. I have lost track of how many times Steph has catered for us over the last four months, but she never falls anywhere short of superb. We live a charmed existence, that is for sure. Nicky said something about affability being preferable to ability (which he stole from me), which led us to a rather funny remembrance involving our resident Belgian, Christiaan Jonkers. Keeping with the legal theme of the day, we recalled an amusing incident when a certain Silk demanded that Jonkers ‘recuse himself’ whilst umpiring. Some consternation had developed over Jonkers repeatedly calling wides, correctly, at the expense of an erratic junior cricketer. Perplexed, Jonkers pointed out that he had already been lenient on the only legal deliveries, and that he, too, was eager to see the end of the over before The Second Coming.
He is nothing if not charitable.
We resumed with a little bit of work to do to get up to par. The wicket, it must be said, was very slow indeed. Timing was difficult at the best of times, but when The Refresher’s turned to their slow bowling quartet to put a stranglehold on proceedings, they did so with aplomb. Richard Longstaff famously took four wickets in four balls in this fixture last season, and it would appear he has passed the baton to young Rafay, who did for us. Kulasingham (25) and Constantine added forty for the sixth wicket, before Rafay had Kulasingham caught on the drive. Henry Longstaff dismissed Constantine in the next over with what TMS are now describing as either a ‘scooter’ or a ‘worm-burner’. I prefer ‘scuttler’, myself.
Over to Rafay. He bowled Bird (1), had Jacot (3) LBW, and bowled the resurrected Pitlarge (1). Batting again, as we were only ten and he had been our lowest scorer, Pitlarge narrowly avoided bagging a pair in the same innings, which is mathematically impossible in anything other than the cricket of the gentleman amateur. Nicole (6*) was the man not out.
Rafay returned quite extraordinary figures of: 4.1 – 0 – 10 – 4.
He is twelve years old. Apparently he is already playing for Surrey.
The V&A were all out for 144; considering how well we started, we were well short of the 180 that Captain Nieboer had asked of us at luncheon.
The Refreshers always bat well. I have nightmares of tall batsmen punching the ball effortlessly down the ground from recent losses. But our opening attack was bolstered by the return of our Bajan Express, Nieboer. He tells me that he is off the carbs at present. I suspect it has added a yard of pace.
It was Kulasingham who got the early breakthrough. He bowled Johnny (5) with an absolute jaffer with his fifth ball. He then had the opposition skipper, Alex (0) caught in the following over. Nieboer piled in to dismiss Henry Longstaff (6) LBW, after brief resistance. Kulasingham had another, Leo (0), bowled.
After 7.1 overs, The Refreshers were 15-4, with their star-studded top order all back in the pavilion. An unbelievable start.
Sachin and Law came together to try and steady the ship. Actually Sachin hit two early boundaries and looked like a man in a hurry to get down to the pub, but saner heads prevailed and the score began to tick over. Law soaked up much of the pressure with dogged defense, and the occasional single. Still, they made it through to tea unscathed, with the score at 54-4 off 15 overs.
Play resumed in much the same fashion, with the scoreboard ticking over despite the accurate bowling of Nicoli and Jacot. Tension began to build as the deficit diminished. Suddenly it was 85-4, with thirteen overs left to play. We desperately needed a wicket. Cometh the hour…
Jacot, deep into his spell, was that man. He dismissed Sachin (39), who top-edged the ball to our incredibly dedicated sub fielder Faras (who began the day as a Refresher). Two balls later he had Rachel (0) caught. A collective sigh of relief was breathed. However, Law remained undefeated at the crease, and Richard Longstaff looked determined. 40 required from 11 overs. Four wickets in hand. Knife edge stuff.
Constantine took one end and bowled in tandem with Jacot and Arnold, searching for the wickets that we surely needed. One member of the V&A, who shall remain nameless, kept chuntering away about how it would come down to wickets, because the runs would be chased easily. Oh he of little faith, I hear you say. But perhaps he had a point. At 129-6, requiring just 16 runs from their final three overs: two of which would be off spin.
Law (37), looking for boundaries, attempted to sweep Constantine. He clipped the ball into his helmet instead. A little shaken, he tried a similar shot two balls later and was comprehensively bowled. His brave vigil had come to an end. Nieboer brought the field up to intimidate Millie (1*). She survived.
The penultimate over, Nieboer’s last, was a masterpiece. He could’ve taken at least two wickets. It went for just two.
Constantine to Longstaff, then. One wily spinner to another. Remarkably, Longstaff took a single off the first ball. Millie then scampered through to get Longstaff back on strike. Looking to free his arms, Longstaff lofted the ball down the ground. Bird, at long off, was in the game. He raced to his right with hands outstretched: glory beckoned. Alas, the ball brushed the very tips of his fingers and crossed the boundary for four. 139-7, with six required from two balls.
Two dot balls to finish. 139-7. The Refreshers had nearly pulled off a remarkable comeback; and the V&A had won by just six runs, conceding less than four runs an over at the death.
These are the games we remember with the most fondness.
Pressure, what pressure?
